Friday, January 7, 2011

Woman to Woman... Looking Out for Each Other

Stop Making Comparisons

We as women always tend to compare ourseves to other women… you know you do! Don’t deny it. It’s in our nature. But, that is what is causing us the most insecurity. I know I am VERY guilty of it.

Picture this…

You are heading to a party and the entire way over there you are wondering if your blouse looks ok, hoping your pants don’t look too tight… how is your hair?? "UGH,  should have worn the black pants… black is MY color. Oh, well… I will just try to ‘hide’ the muffin top as much as possible… uhm, ok I will wear this sweater." You walk in, and yeah… there she is.. she looks great, like always. Why did I even try knowing she’d be here? I look so dumb next to her…

C’mon, you can admit that you HAVE had these thought… you have felt that way at one time or another… RIGHT? RIGHT? Seriously, don’t leave me hanging…

Then you have the OTHER scenario… the “Yeah, I know I look good… She.is.no.competition for me… I will stay with this crowd because all these ladies ENVY me… “ Yeah, we ALL know someone like that too… OR perhaps we HAVE been this person at some point in our life?!

Beth Moore discusses this ‘complex’ in Chapter 15 of her book – So Long, Insecurity (have I meantioned it is an amazing book?)

The nature of our competition depends to a large extent on what we tend to value. If intelligence is high on the list, given the opportunity, we will try to assess whether or not the people around us seem smarter than we are. If appearance is a personal premium, we have the tendency to rate ourselves according to the looks of those in eyeshot…same with talent, giftedness, spirituality, and success… .
… we can stop playing the game… when we work from an activated mentality of God-given security, we are fully capable of thinking another woman is beautiful without concluding we are ugly. We can esteem another woman’s achievements without feeling like an idiot. We can admire another woman’s terrific shape without feeling like a slob. Where on earth did we come up with the idea that we have to subtract value from ourselves in order to give credit to someone else?

More examples…

I tried to talk to her + she seemed really distracted = she hates me
She’s really gorgeous + she gets a lot of attention that I don’t= she must be really conceited
She’s got this + she’s got that= I’ve got nothing…

Are we getting the picture? Yeah, I know…

I mean, I will admit… math has ALWAYS been my weakness, but I never thought I was THIS bad at it!

Galatians 5:26

'We will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original.'

You heard it here… straight from the sacred text itself!

So make the commitment… catch yourself in the act of comparing… call yourself out! You are better than that… tell yourself that…

 I AM better than that!


Blessings always,


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